Friday, June 20, 2008

Stonewall's Jerquee - BBQ Beef

Stonewall's Jerquee - BBQ BeefStonewall's Jerquee is a brand of snacks that bills itself as the world's best tasting vegetarian jerky, claiming to offer the same great chewing pleasure of real meat jerky.

Having tried a few vegetarian jerkies, I opened this package with some doubt, but questioned if this might be somewhat good after all. I mean, it actually has something of a smokey aroma, though clearly different than real meat. It actually looks like it might taste good.

The Stonewall's Jerquee brand is owned by Lumen Foods of Lake Charles, LA, which makes a variety of other soybean-based foods.

Ingredients

Defatted soy flour, purified water, soybean oil, autolyzed yeast, fructose, tomato paste, mustard, honey, molasses, onion, garlic, peppers (cayenne and white pepper), lemon, vinegar, spices, salt, and potassium sorbate.

Taste

This brand of soybean jerky has a similar taste as the other vegan-jerky brands I've had, though not quite as harsh, perhaps because this stuff appears to be more dry. It still has that semi-sour milk taste that was left in a bowl of Lucky Charms. But I found I was able to chew it long enough and swallow without gagging.

The BBQ beef flavoring does come through, but mostly as a pepper taste, and only after the first 10 seconds of chewing. But I can't really say that this tastes like BBQ beef. This just tastes like all the other vegan jerkies, but just drier.

This does have a more salty taste than the other brands, however.

The company recommends microwaving these pieces, but I couldn't get myself to do so. I was starting to grow weary.

Consistency

These pieces are about the size of a chicken nugget, or maybe a little smaller.

They're somewhat greasy, leaving a fine film of oil on your fingers.

They also chew like a sponge. You can bite down on them fairly easily, but once they reach maximum compression, it becomes hard, just like biting down on a dish-washing sponge.

Once you're able to chew this, it feels more like a McDonald's Chicken McNugget that was nuked in a microwave for too long, and hardened up. Kinda chewy, kinda tough, but resembling nothing like meat.

And just why would a vegan want a product that eats like real meat? I thought they didn't care for meat. Like I said in my other reviews, this is proof that vegans secretly desire to feast on animal flesh.

Stonewall's Jerquee - BBQ Beef

Stonewall's Jerquee - BBQ Beef

Product Value

I paid $1.89 for this 1.5oz bag at a Sprouts store in Temecula, CA. That works out to $1.26 per oz, within the average price range for jerky.

I'd say that as a soybean-based jerky, this actually offers great value. Of all such jerkies I've tried, this actually has the best taste I've encountered thus far. But don't get me wrong, it's still nasty in my opinion, just not as nasty.

But as a BBQ Beef variety, it fails terribly. This tastes nothing like BBQ beef, it doesn't resemble anything I might find from a BBQ grill, not even the charred-black chunks of BBQ sauce. All it offers is a peppery taste that takes about 10 seconds to show itself.

Rating

I'm rating this as "dog treats".

As in the other vegan-jerky reviews I've written, I can't understand why a soybean-based product has to taste so bad. Having grown up around Japanese-cuisine, I've eaten a lot of soybean foods. The Japanese are probably the kings of soybean innovation, making a wide variety of soybean snacks, all of which tastes quite good. And I'm a guy who loves real meat.

I'm thinking companies like Lumen Foods, have an awful lot to learn from the Japanese.

Rating: Dog Treats

Buy this online:

7 comments:

  1. You are so WRONG! I am a meat-eater and I LOVE these snacks, try a different flavor, my favorite is spicy chicken.

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  2. dude many vegetarians were raised as meat eaters by their parents so they got a taste for certain textures and spices. it has nothing to do with the taste of meat. meat doesnt taste like anything without spices on it. next time you make hamburger helper dont put any salt or anything on the meat and revel in the blandest food in the world

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  3. dude, you should know about dog treats, there generally invited to dinner as the main course I hear where your from. I love this product, and you just keep eating your meat- hope it's USDA approved, cause you most likely have great faith in our government when it comes to caring about your meat- and since when do vegetarians care what meat eaters think?

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  4. To who ever said meat has no flavor... I have to say that apparently you haven't ate good meat before.

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  5. the guy who wrote this blog is right! Guess what, I was trying to be a vegetarian for a year and for god's sake I'm a 'meat' person...after all I'm just a human being, I know wearing furs are wrong but not for eat the meat itself...

    It's a harsh life for me to pretend to be a vegetarian and eat this fake so called meat...taste weird. Maybe it's not for me...

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  6. As others have said, some folks choose not to eat meat for lots of reasons -- dietary, religious, ethical, etc -- but were raised eating meat. Being a vegetarian/vegan doesn't mean you don't like the TASTE of meat, it means you're choosing not to eat it. Products like this are savory and rich and give vegetarians a great option for snacking.

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  7. Haha i dont secretly want anything, i crave to rip flesh from a nice juicey rare steak, but i choose not to.

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